Disclaimer: The following is a ridiculously long blog post, but when I get all riled up, I get wordy. If you have no interest in breastfeeding, please feel free to not read. And even if you do wish to read, I would not blame you if you needed a few sessions to digest the entirety of my ramblings.
I’m not sure what I can add to the excellent discussion started by Suburban Oblivion and continued by Velveteen Mind and the Huffington Post, in response to Bill Maher’s inane comments about breastfeeding. Go over and read their posts if you’re unfamiliar with what this is about. Basically, Mr. Maher feels that women should not breastfeed in public because like masturbation (!) breastfeeding is a private act which should only be done in private.
I’m going to do my best not to merely repeat the points in the above posts, but to share my own experiences with breastfeeding. From the point of conception, the message that “breast is best” is shoved down every mother-to-be’s throat. The very fact that we need to so vigorously promote something that is supposed to be a normal function of a woman’s body is a bit odd. As mothers we all know that the choice to breast or bottle feed has left the private arena and has become an emotionally charged political decision. And as with most choices that we make as mothers, you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
Hardcore advocates of breastfeeding sometimes vilify mothers who choose to bottle-feed, rather than looking at the root of the issue. I do breastfeed, but I fully understand the lure of bottle feeding. Especially when your baby is feeding more waking hours than not, your breasts hurt or are even bleeding, you are incredibly exhausted by the unexpected learning curve of breastfeeding, or in rare circumstances, there may be medical reasons why you cannot breastfeed.
I do not scowl in the direction of every bottle feeding mama, especially since North America is so lacking in its social policies and attitudes that would provide a supportive environment for breastfeeding. Although it is medically recommended that women breastfeed exclusively for the first 6 months, in the United States it is not uncommon for women to only receive 6 weeks of unpaid maternity leave. If I had to go back to work out of financial necessity after 6 weeks and since I’ve never had much luck with pumping, I would have probably stopped breastfeeding. If women had more in the way of social supports, perhaps breastfeeding would be more of a realistic option for all women, not just for those who have the economic means to have access to such supports.
I’m lucky in one way in that I live in Canada and since we’re such crazy socialists, we get one year of paid maternity leave – you receive 55% of your annual salary and your company has a legal obligation to hold your position until you return. This benefit along with access to free health care has supported my choice to breastfeed. Even with these supports, our breastfeeding rates are still not ideal. I think this mostly has to do with the mixed messages and social stigma that still surrounds breastfeeding.
In terms of mixed messages, the hospital and the community health nurses repeatedly praised me for my choice to breastfeed. And yet, despite the fact that both of my babies were thriving on breast milk, I had formula shoved in my face during my first home visit by the nurses. With Elliot, I was in hysterics, because the nurses made me feel like I was starving my baby because she didn’t poop enough in her first few days. They insisted I didn’t have enough milk and that I should supplement with formula. What they didn’t tell me is that breastfeeding works through supply and demand and that the less a baby sucks, the less milk you will produce. So if you supplement enough, you’ll soon be resigned to solely bottle feeding.
Their suggestion didn’t feel right to me, but I did what I was told and supplemented a bit, because they’re professionals and I trusted their judgment over my own maternal instincts. At one week old, I took Elliot to a pediatrician sure that he would whisk her away to Children’s Services as it was clear I was somehow abusing her by breastfeeding. He was incredibly upset that the nurses had scared the shit out of me by insisting she wasn’t getting enough milk without even weighing her. He weighed her and checked her out, only to find that she was doing exceptionally well.
So, when Arlo was born and the nurses gave me the same song and dance about leaving me formula “just in case” – despite their comments that he was incredibly alert and sleeping well for such a small baby – I resisted the urge to tell them to politely fuck off. I did, however, refuse the formula. I had already breastfed one infant for almost a year – for Christ’s sake, I know what I am doing! Anyway that’s basically what I told them when they continued to call me and harass me by insisting that I must be doing something wrong because I was in pain and bleeding. I persevered and now Arlo is a great little breastfeeder. We just had to get past the first rough month (and kick some serious ass along the way). Clearly, despite the medical establishment’s supposed support for breastfeeding, much more effort needs to be made in actually supporting and educating nursing mothers and the general public so that mothers are not scared into abandoning breastfeeding without giving it a real chance.
In terms of social stigma, with Elliot I covered up even in my own home! The brother-in-law was living with us, and heaven forbid he should be made to feel uncomfortable. I was terrified of going out in public for fear that my child may actually have to eat. I spent many a family gathering hiding in someone’s bedroom or in the mall feeding my baby in a gross public bathroom. I even left a restaurant once because I was too embarrassed to feed my screaming baby. Honestly. Isn’t motherhood isolating enough without us having to feel like we need to hide at home for a year to nourish our growing child?
I often wondered if these measures were necessary. Were people really so disgusted by breastfeeding? After being confronted by many ignorant comments, I realized that yes, many people are that disgusted. Things have been said to me like, “Do you really have to do that right now?” Well, I’m here and breast milk does digest really quickly so the baby does have to eat often, like every 2 hours or so. So, yes, I do have to and no I’m not choosing to whip my boob out for fun. My baby actually needs to eat RIGHT NOW. And it’s not just men. Women have bought into the cultural idea that breastfeeding is gross. Women have said to me, “I’m not going to breastfeed. It’s just weird. (Or “unnatural”. Or “Something about it just doesn’t seem right”). But feeding a baby man-made chemicals out of a man-made container is natural?
Or the other day when I was at a family gathering, a male family friend (who is a paramedic! who sees naked bleeding people daily), was offended when I started to breastfeed (even under a receiving blanket). He said, “That’s my cue to leave.” Someone else remarked, “But you can’t see anything!” To which he replied, “Yes. But I know what’s going on under there.” Hmm. But you know that I walk around all day with my offensive breasts hidden under my shirt. Why do you not look away then when you see all women walking by with their instruments of disgust lurking beneath their clothing?
What I find most ironic about Bill Maher and others that have and continue to perpetuate his unhealthy attitude towards breastfeeding, is that I’m sure he has no problem paying to see breasts dancing on a stripper pole. And no problem watching porn featuring breasts! to fuel his masturbatory fantasies. Are these men jealous of a baby’s unrestricted access to the goods that they previously owned the rights to? Are they so arrogant as to believe that breasts were created solely for the purposes of foreplay and to fill out low-cut tops for their oogling pleasure? Breasts were designed to feed babies, not as a fun playground equipment type of add-on for the menfolk. Sorry, boys.
So all of this is to say that yes, now I do breastfeed in public. I’ll admit that I still feel a bit uncomfortable about it and that I often cover up. I admire women who whip it out without a care and am working hard to be one of those women. But I am a product of North American culture. A culture that tells women they must be ashamed of their own bodies. They must reject even the most natural of instincts in favor of not offending others’ delicate sensibilities. In many other countries people do not blink an eye when they see a nursing mother and these same people mock our puritan views on nudity.
So, I’m going to try harder to promote a quiet activism. To promote the normal, banal act that breastfeeding should be. Because by hiding while breastfeeding, I’m helping to perpetuate the myth that breastfeeding is something to be ashamed of. Something that makes a mother a social outcast. A freak. Rather than worrying about making others uncomfortable, I should be concerned about why it is an issue in the first place. And why the priority of others’ feelings and comfort levels should be placed above mine and those of my baby.
I hope that mothers, including myself, will stop hiding. That we will take pride in the power of our bodies to sustain a life. When I breastfeed in public, I’m certainly not standing on top of a mall bench whipping my top off and twirling it around my head while doing pelvic thrusts in a kind of look-at-me-I’m-celebrating-breastfeeding prelude dance. I’m discretely keeping my baby alive while continuing to participate in the outside world. And I don’t expect passerbys to take the amount of time needed to stare intently at my chest until they happen to see a flash of nipple. And if someone feels the need to look that hard, they need to seriously get a life.
I must add that although I am pissed about Mr. Maher’s comments, I am even more pissed that he is merely a mouthpiece for the many other men and women who share his beliefs. People who keep quiet because they (rightfully) fear the wrath of all of us “irrational and hormonal” womenfolk. They too, like me, are a product of the North American culture. Sometimes when we are so enmeshed in a culture it is difficult to untangle truths from misguided beliefs. It’s much easier to accept that this is “just the way things are” than to question why they are this way and what we are going to do to change it.
*Do you have anything to add? Despite the length of this post, this is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to this conversation. Please participate by leaving me a comment below or let me know if you write your own post about this issue. Thanks!
Andi – I was so angry when I read about Bill Maher this morning, I couldn’t post about it – I couldn’t articulate as well as you have, my feelings on the whole thing.
Your point is well made – we do need to quietly revolutionize the way people view breastfeeding. Sadly, many years ago the formula companies won over so many women fooling them into thinking that formula was better, by hailing formula feeding as a more sophisticated way to feed your baby. As my own mother told me when she had me in Africa, bottle feeding seemed so much more civilized compared to what indigent women in what was essentially a third world environment did. She did see the error of her ways, and was angry at herself for being swayed by the big business of SMA (British Formula company), and she went on to breastfeed my sister.
Bill Maher is an idiot and that’s about all I can say about him right now.
WOW! I have been reading your blog for awhile now, and just had to respond today. I apologize in advance for what is sure to be a long-winded response. You expressed so eloquently what I have experienced. I have had three beautiful children, and choose not to breastfeed the first one because I bought into the social stigma. I made a leap of faith into the breastfeeding my second two, and hit every medical and social obstacle imaginable. I heard assinine comments such as “my baby was allergic to breastmilk” and “you have to supplement for the vitamins” and “maybe your milk is no good”. First off, oh my word, allergic?! What freaking planet are you from? Secondly, breast milk is superior nutritionally, and thirdly breast milk doesn’t have an expiry date! At first, I was very uncomfortable breastfeeding around anyone aside from close friends, my hubby and my mom because of other people’s views on breastfeeding. Thank goodness by my last baby I didn’t particularily care where I was(within reason), if my baby was hungry I was going to suck it up, put my embarrassment aside and nurse my little man. I was blessed to have a wonderfully supportive public health nurse (I bow down to you Teri!) who was there for me with both babies I breastfed, and she really helped me keep my sanity when others were questioning my choice to breastfeed a small, lazy baby. It seems when your baby doesn’t conform to society’s perception that only amazon babies are healthy, a baby that is built like his daddy who is well over 6 feet, yet weighs under 150 lbs (bastard), despite a healthy appetite boggles the medical establishment. I do not judge other women who choose to bottle feed, because I did for my first one. The choice is an individual one, and I hope that women have access to sound information, devoid of guilt from those on the radical side of breastfeeding, and old-wives tales that discourage women from breastfeeding. Chew on this for a moment…my husband’s best friend married a girl who seriously lacks a nurturing nature and she told me if she has a baby she wouldn’t breastfeed because she “doesn’t want THAT kind of a bond with a baby”. Backwards thinking like that astounds me, I am completely in love with all of my babies, breastfeeding has nothing to do with it. Why is it okay to look at a half-naked girl on a billboard, but a mom covered by a receiving blanket nursing a baby sends people screaming in the other direction?
I’m with Annie, I was so angry upon hearing about this I wasn’t able to form a coherent post that didn’t include the word “f*cker” over and over.
Your thoughts had me nodding YES! YES! YES! over and over. I was also fearful of leaving the house when Carson was born over fear that he’d need to eat. I still try and plan outings around Ella’s feeding times so that I don’t have to worry about feeding her in public. And it’s because of people like this weasel Maher.
To equate breastfeeding with masterbation is the highest form of ignorance. To sexualize breastfeeding continues to perpetuate this negative attitude towards breastfeeding in our culture. Many people, including nurses and MY OWN PEDIATRICIAN are not educated about breastfeeding. It will continue to be this way until society as a whole can accept and understand breastfeeding. Sadly, we’re a long way off from this.
Happy birthday to Jason, by the way.
Great post, Andi!
I was medically unable to breastfeed. I wish I could have at least tried it but at the same time I would have had the guilt eating at me if I had decided it wasn’t for me.
I admire women who breastfeed, at the same time if a woman is so comfortable breastfeeding that they whip them around like sippy cups with no modesty or regards to others personal feelings is when I start to have an opinion.
Breasts have been so sexualized in our society that breastfeeding has become taboo, “how dare you use your sexy naughty bits to feed a baby, they’re for sexual enjoyment!” When it was in our creator’s original plan that boobs are for babies.
[...] My Two Breasts, I mean, Cents [...]
Great post!
I wrote about this last week before BM put in his two balls, I mean, cents. http://awholelotofnothing.net/?p=42
I wanna move to Canada for all of your crazy socialist beliefs, but just for June-Sept.
I’ve nursed just about everywhere — mall benches, airplanes, even during my stepdaughter’s piano recital — and I’ve done so discreetly.
Nobody ever gave me a hard time, which is why I’m always so caught off-guard by some people’s ignorance and intolerance.
I don’t walk up to teenage girls (or their mothers) and ask why they’re running around in tops that look like they came straight from a lingerie drawer at the Hefner mansion.
In turn, I expect that people respect my right to bare a portion of my boobs — a much smaller portion, I might add — to feed a baby.
The best non-reaction I ever got? That of the male photographer driving another reporter and me around post-Katrina New Orleans. In that case, I was pumping, which is a lot more noticeable (and noisier) than breastfeeding.
The photographer actually FORGOT that I was pumping and pulled over to ask some construction workers for directions.
THAT is how things should be.
I know a post is fabulously written when I wince at first sight of the length of it, then get so wrapped up in it that time doesn’t even seem to pass. Loved it. I can only nod and applaud. I can’t think what to say that hasn’t been said already.
Right, on, sistagirl!
I’m feeling ya on this one.
Mine’s here and my similar in stance breastfeeding diatribe is here.
Bill Maher is such a TOOL.
If breastfeeding were so sexual (and I’ve said this before) we would see pictorials in Playboy and the like of women nursing. But we don’t.
It is an act of humanity. We’re FEEDING A BABY. Period. Bill Maher is a moron.
While I do understand that exposing a breast would cause some people to be uncomfortable (for the mother or for other people around her), the act of feeding an infant is not an act of desire. It is a natural maternal role for sustaining life.
If Bill’s comment were remotely true than breastfeeding would be incest. I have no idea why he’d go on record to the media with a quote like that.
I really don’t understand why people get so bent out of shape. I used to see it in the restaurant all the time (maybe not all the time, but often enough) and after the initial “oh” its a non-issue. That baby needs to eat, and mom is there to feed it.
My Mom nursed both my brother and me for longer than a lot of people do. We are healthy, (relatively) intelligent, and really close to our mom, and I think a lot of that has to do with all the good things a body gets from breastmilk, and the bonding time we spent with her.
When I have kids I want to nurse them, and I hope I won’t have to feel ashamed for trying to keep my baby alive.
This is just another situation of men trying to control the “little women”. I thought we were beyond being under the thumb of controlling jerks,
This post is such a great way to bring REALITY back into this discussion. And it’s really funny too. My favourite parts:
“Why do you not look away then when you see all women walking by with their instruments of disgust lurking beneath their clothing?”
AND
“When I breastfeed in public, I’m certainly not standing on top of a mall bench whipping my top off and twirling it around my head while doing pelvic thrusts in a kind of look-at-me-I’m-celebrating-breastfeeding prelude dance.”
Seriously – laughing until I cry at those.
Another “CLASSIC” ! ” Mothers unite! BM run for your life!”
Fantastic, Andi!
I wasn’t able to breastfeed, and I had to scream at the nurses to get me a bottle. The Poo wasn’t getting any food from me and I knew it, and the staff thought they knew better.
Finally, a lactation consultant agreed with me. The worst was how other women judged me for bottle feeding.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t find Bill Maher outrageous. While I often enjoy his political commentary, he often displays his adolescent sexual foibles when he launches into diatribes like this one. I saw this episode, and it made me furious.
Amen, sister. You not only have experienced much of what I did when I breastfed both boys (Ben, who refused solids for some time because of texture issues, nursed until he was two), but you articulate so well why we should stop covering up, literally and metaphorically.
Hate BM.
Testify, Sister, testify!
I didn’t love breastfeeding but I didn’t hate it either. I couldn’t agree more about motherhood being a very isolating experience. It can be hard enough to keep your baby happy and safe from the strangers who feel it is their right to push themselves inside their babyseats and fondle them while the poor little baby is trying to sleep. Now we’re supposed to hide or leave the room to feed this little miracle.
And you know, those people who condemn mothers who breastfeed probably spend their evenings with some Playboys and a bottle of lube.
OH you said it. I can’t believe that Bill Maher said that. Unbelievable.
One time at a gathering at family friends, I had to feed Finn (shocking as he was a baby). I was just going to go to the living room where there was a nice comfortable chair (and no one around) to feed him. I was quickly whisked away to the spare room where I had to sit on a bed in the dark to feed instead because that was “better”. And I did. I didn’t make a stink and stay in the living room, because I didn’t want to be rude. I shouldn’t have – I regret not being more forceful and saying, no, I’m fine here. I hope you have more backbone in your endeavour not to be shoved in the other room.
Give me the name of that paramedic. I’m going to flash that fucker! One for all and all for one – breastfeeding!!!!! I remember feeling like I lost a limb when I gave it up when my sidekick was 9 months. I just don’t get breastfeeding a 6 year old! Hmmm….
Great, great post. I breastfed both of my kids until they were 18-24 months. I don’t even know what to add because you wrote everything that I feel/felt. Really excellent, Andi.
When I was pregnant with Matilda I worked with a woman who had a baby and she was a completely fearless nurser. She had a smile that made other people smile and was just one of those people who made others feel good about themselves, and when she nursed her daughter she made it seem like the most normal thing in the world. Watching her one day, close to the end of my pregnancy, I resolved to follow her lead. I had known before that I would breastfeed, but her confidence inspired me to do it without fear.
I breastfed in public with both my girls and, like Cathy, never had someone make a big deal about it. This might be due to the fact that I’d stare people down if they looked at me funny.
And finally, there was one guy at the restaurant where I worked who had a reaction similar to the paramedic, but he would just leave the room, and I was fine with that, in fact, I started making fun of him for it after a while.
I breastfed at parties, in restaurants, with family, with friends, at the mall, at the Beach; and noone ever seemed to flinch. Maybe it was because I didn’t give a shit what anyone else thought. I remember breastfeeding ShaSha on Parksville Beach while running after Bman (20 months at the time). I’m sure my cover-up towel flew off a couple of times, but WHATEVER…I was feeding one, while trying to catch the other one before he drowned in the ocean.
I also remember sitting beside your Dad once, and asking him if it bothered him if I breastfed. He said, “of course not, I’ve seen plenty of teets in my time”. Bless that Man’t heart!
Larsen and I will come and beat up your Paramedic “friend” just after we send some serious hate mail to Bill Maher.
Breastfeeding rocks!
I’ve never even breast fed and I want to whip my girls out for all to see!
Happily submitted to Stumble Upon. This is a fabulous post and more people should read it. “Quiet activism.” Exactly, Andi. You are awesome, indeed.
I am going to write about it. It’s been bugging me ever since I saw Bill Maher open his fucking mouth and call me lazy.
I’m with Kimberly in that the long post seemed daunting until I was gripped by it. Bill Maher is an idiot, and so is anyone who gets uncomfortable watching a woman breast feed. It’s sad that we live in a society that’s objectified boobs to the point that we’ve (the idiots) lost sight with why they exist in the first place. Great post.
that was so well written that I could have read two more pages of it. sometimes a long post is what is called for. Bill Maher is a mysogonist. He always has been a total sexist. It’s beyond me that people have an issue with breastfeeding in public. We are doing such a loving thing and it’s an outrage for anyone to dispute that. I whipped the big boobs out whenever I could. Screaming child or giant nipple? Your choice. On a different note, I do feel that the recent breastfeeding campaign was not inclusive and put a lot of pressure on women. Educated choice is the goal. Support is what all new moms need. It’s no easy task becoming a mom. Breastmilk is not the only element to raising a healthy baby. And moms who bottle feed should not be made to feel that way. Maybe this will open up a discussion that will enlighten insted of pit women against each other. Hopefully…..
Ok I typed a big long response to this in support of public breastfeeding then the Terrorist came a pushed something and it’s gone…and I yelled GRRR… not a good way to start off the morning BUT…I’ll paraphase again
I’m a whip it out and feed em’ when they are hungry..anytime, anywhere in front of anyone. The ONLY time I went into another room to feed was if I was at someones house where the homeowner was uncomfortable with it and that was very rare. I must have a ‘don’t mess with me’ aura because I never had anyone comment about it and if I got odd looks I guess I just didn’t realize. I never used a nursing cover but did make sure I was ‘covered’ as much as possible by whatever clothing I was wearing. BM is a jackass (I’m pretty sure I can use other language here but I’ll refrain LOL) he has many opinions I don’t agree with and therefore I ignore him. Stupidity should not be rewarded
Keep feeding… do it in public….and enjoy
Consider yourself a walking public service announcement~
P.S. Terrorist breastfeed until just after her 2nd birthday (her choice NOT mine LOL) and I feed her in public until she was about 18 months. After that we made it a quiet time at home event only because in public she was old enough to be handed a cup of milk and some cheerios!
I did write a post and will probably be write one more focus on the birth part of his comments…also, I think he’s really got the wrong end of the stick here, people who care about “causes” are more likely to care about other causes – in other words breastfeeding advocates are more likely to care about a war protest or about environmentally friendly legislation because they are already of the mindset that the personal choices they make have a political impact…shot his own cause in the foot, I say, either that or he’s just like a papa gerbil eating his own young for no good reason.
The mixed messages are what really rile me up. You touched on that extremely well.
I hope Bill apologizes, though I’m not counting on it.
I didn’t think I could add any more to what you fabulous women have said.
I just don’t get it. What’s with the anger against women feeding their babies??!!! Really, it is beyond my comprehension.
Everyone – thank you, as always, for your thoughtful comments and for sharing so much of yourself with me. I always love reading about everyone else’s experiences and how they relate to what I went through.
At least we can thank Bill Maher (ha ha) for providing an opportunity for us all to discuss some of the issues that surround breastfeeding. It’s been so great to see so many different perspectives floating around the blogosphere about this. I hope that the discussions that took place this week can be used as a springboard for further action to dispel some of the myths surrounding breastfeeding and help to promote better supports for all mothers in doing what is best for their babies.
Great post…and he’s an ass.
I’m glad you commented at my place so I found this post. Awesome!
“Isn’t motherhood isolating enough without us having to feel like we need to hide at home for a year to nourish our growing child?”
ABSOLUTELY. I’m tired of the shame people seem to expect parents to feel, especially with regard to caring for the children. And, currently, and on and off again regularly, about breastfeeding.
As for your male family friend…at least he expected himself to leave, although that comment…yes, I got that too, and it doesn’t feel great. Segregating isn’t cool for either person.
But it also proves my point, which is that this is about the act of breastfeeding, and no amount of cover-up can fix the skeeves some people have.
I suggest: therapy. A much better cover-up. (Which is not intended as any slam on therapy, which can be great.)
Julie
Using My Words
you’ve certainly given me something to think about, andi. i think next time bug gets hungry when we’re out and about, i WILL do a prelude dance. then people will be more offended by my horrible lack of rhythm and coordination and not care a whit about my potentially miniscule (honestly) exposure.
but seriously…
i was too nervous with my first to nurse in public and consequently made her go hungry for much longer than necessary. it resulted, predictably, in a lowered supply and i resorted to formula supplementation and the downward spiral that creates.
with #2, i am determined to do all sorts of things better, and being comfortable enough with myself to nurse whenever and wherever she’s hungry is a major priority. it took some getting used to, but after nearly 6 months, i have few issues. i will feed her at a restaurant, if we happen to be there, although i still cover up around my fil and bil. i emphasize it even more strongly around my friends who are becoming mothers for the first time. i want to set a good example for them of doing what’s right for myself and my baby.
i just recently discovered, to my …shame? disappointment?, that my husband actually disapproves of my nursing in public. who knew after 8 years of marriage and 6 years of parenthood? i told him, “too bad”. he said, “you don’t care what i think.” i said, “it’s not that i don’t care, but in this case, my opinion carries far more weight than yours does.”
Nice post Andi, I can’t believe people are so stupid. I breastfeed in public without covering up only because it causes more of a show with Travis pulling it off and careening his head around it to see which as you know isn’t so comfy for the one with the boobs. I am totally behind everyone who breastfeeds in public and for the people who make comments and feel offended, they can seriously kiss my ass! Glad to see you feel the same as I do. Take care and have fun nursing little Arlo!
Andi: You SO rock.
Personally I believe that breast feeding is a beautiful thing I am 17 and my son is 5 months old. I am still breast feeding him I have breast fed him in public a few time, but it does make me feel uncomfortable because people around me (in public places) tends to act as if it is weird or disgusting. My whole family is very supportive of it though even my dad and my boyfriend’s family, too. I feed him in front of who ever I want. I feel that breast feeding a baby is the same as someone eating in public if you don’t like for a baby who cannot fend for itself to eat in public, then you shouldn’t do it either. Because one thing that I find disgusting is going into a restaurant and watching how some people it, I find them to be more indecent then seeing another women’s breast. You don’t see the mess a baby is making all over the place and being rude eating with their mother wide open or spitting everywhere and talking so loud they disturb everyone around them. I would much rather eat in a place where everyone was breastfeeding their babies or even shop in a place where women were breastfeeding them then to have to put up with the rude disgusted unmannered people you see in public.